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CultFootball Editors: “If we wrote for the Guardian, we’d have a million hits a week”

September 17, 2010 — by Sean

Today’s statement by Fat Sam has set us thinking along the same lines here at the CultFootball headquarters. While we have historically ranged in the high double–low triple digit daily readership, we’re of such quality that a more monied institution with better resources would 1. be lucky to have us, and 2. increase our hit rate thousands of times over.

What inspiration is it you ask? Allardyce’s “better than this” comments that were surely made from a pub stool:

“I’m not suited to Bolton or Blackburn, I would be more suited to Inter or Real Madrid,” Allardyce said. “It wouldn’t be a problem to me to go and manage those clubs because I would win the double or the league every time. Give me Manchester United or Chelsea and I would do the same, it wouldn’t be a problem. It’s not where I’m suited to, it’s just where I’ve been for most of the time.”

Well touch me in the morning, this guy is really on to something.

Commentary

Champions League: What We Saw

September 16, 2010 — by Sean

maarten-stekelenburg — What more can I do?

The cultfootball brain trust was huddled around a giant screen for three of yesterday’s matches, though we tended to pause longer on Real Madrid v Ajax a bit more than the others. Whereas the Chelsea and Arsenal matches were blowouts, Real always looked like they might give one up on the counter, and Ajax are no slacks— though their real standout was the keeper Maarten Stekelenburg (who you may remember from the World Cup). We didn’t have the chance to see the other games as we don’t have Direct TV, the bastards.

On a night when Real’s strikers had ample opportunity to shut down the game, Stekelenburg consistently provided no angle for glory. There were nearly 20 shots between Higuaín, Ronaldo, and di María, and only Higuaín put the ball away (and only from very close range for what we thought were a couple of slop goals). Ronaldo’s shots were particularly funny to us, sour grapes mostly because once he breaks his duck you just know the goals will come pouring in.

Higuaín on the other hand doesn’t look like much of a superstar striker. He does have a deceptively quick first step, exhibited mostly in closing down defenders, but he doesn’t exactly play with his head up. Still, he finds himself the right positions to slam home easy goals, and that’s a skill of high value, though often overlooked for carefully crafted movement finished off with a precision volley or some curling dipper.

Real’s attacking movement was created almost completely by some combination of Marcelo, Özil, and di María. The three looked fantastic, especially the Turkish German, and it gives me some sense that Mourinho won’t settle on an entirely defensive-minded strategy in the season to come. Only time will tell of course, as the true test will be El Clásico on the 28th of November.

Oh, and did I mention the most important member of the cultfootball team?

Commentary News

David Weir: Old Guy

September 15, 2010 — by Sean — 2

While we flipped through the Champions League games today one man stood out: David Weir. Not for his defensive prowess, nor for any particularly stellar play, but for the fact that, during a close-up of the man yelling at the ref, he looked amazingly old.

The captain of Rangers did indeed anchor an incredibly stubborn defense in a hostile Old Trafford this afternoon, and managed to hold together his troops without himself causing anyone a horrific injury (see further down for some home-shot video of Valencia’s season-ending ankle break).

Weir’s elderly appearance set us looking for his record. The man is a sturdy 40 years of age, and seems to only be getting more sure with the passing years. He spent the first few seasons of his career in Scotland, working his way through Falkrik and Hearts before signing with Everton, where he captained the side under two managers. After 8 1/2 season in the EPL he went back home and is now with Rangers, where just last year he received the Scottish Football Writers’ Association Player of the Year Award (this just 3 days before his 40th birthday).

Footytube has a bit about him after his performance today:

Recently recalled to the Scotland squad, Weir became the oldest player to represent his country when he appeared in their recent Euro 2012 qualifying matches. Last season he was the Scottish Premier League’s player of the year and won the equivalent award from the country’s football writers. He has the lean outline and undemonstrative air of a man who has survived many harsh campaigns and on last night’s display he looks good for another outstanding year in both shades of blue.

And now, as promised, handheld footage of the Valencia injury. They didn’t show replays, so you’ll have to squint some and catch it on the fly. It’s not as horrific as Eduardo’s snapped ankle a couple seasons back, but it’s clearly a clean double break and a floppy foot flying through the air.

Commentary Schedule

Champions League starts today! Matchday 1 Fixtures

September 14, 2010 — by Suman

What is arguably the World Cup of club soccer starts later today–the UEFA Champions League. Like the World Cup, it features most of the top players in the world, and consists of 32 teams that will compete in a group stage to advance to a knockout phase. Unlike the World Cup, however, it’s an annual affair–and stretches over 8 months, with this year’s final to be played on Saturday May 28, on the storied pitch of Wembley Stadium.

The group phase starts today, with “Matchday 1” consisting of 8 matches today (Tuesday Sept 14): 2 games in each in Groups and 8 matches tomorrow (Wednesday Sept 15). Today’s 8 matches feature the 16 teams in Groups A, B, C, and D, with tomorrow’s from the other 4 groups (E, F, G, and H).

Looking ahead, the group stage consists of 6 Tuesday-Wednesday “Matchdays” to allow for home-and-away round robin within in each group (each team needs to play the other 3 teams in its group twice–hence 6 matches): Sept 14-15, Sept 28-29, Oct 19-20, Nov 2-3, Nov 23-24, and Dec 7-8. The top two teams in each group will advance to the knockout phase, with the Round of 16 matches February 15-23 and March 8-16 in the new year; the quarterfinals April 5-6 and April 12-13; the semifinals April 26-27 and May 3-4; and the final on May 28.

We’ve got full details on the Matchday 1 fixtures below, but here’s what jumps out at us among today’s 8 matches (and what to watch):

(1) Defending champion Inter Milan starts its campaign for two in a row today against Dutch side Twente Enschede; this match is on Fox Soccer Channel (FSC; and like all of today’s and tomorrow’s matches, kicks off at 2:45pm ET). Ironically, Inter is led on the field by Dutch midfielder and World Cup star Wes Sneijder; but unlike last year, they won’t be led by manager Jose Mourinho (called by some “the special one”), who has moved to Real Madrid, in an attempt to try to repeat his managing success there. See here for some coverage of how Mourinho has taken to some sniping at his successor at Inter, Rafa Benitez.

(2) Tottenham Hotspur squeezed into the competition a couple weeks ago, by eliminating Young Boys of Switzerland in qualifying; see John Lally’s preview of that game for some idea of what it means for Spurs to be back in Europe. They’ll visit Werder Bremen today; you can watch that one when it’s rebroadcast on Fox Sports Espanol at 5pm ET.

(3) Manchester United stays at home, hosting Scottish side Rangers. The story line here is Wayne Rooney, who returns to the field after Sir Alex Ferguson kept him on the bench this past Saturday against Everton (the club that signed him at the age of 10!)–ostensibly to spare him what would have been graphic but creative verbal abuse, following Rooney’s domination of the English tabloids last week (see here if you missed that story!). That game is being televised live on Fox Sports Net (FSN; as they say, check your local listings), but will be rebroadcast on Fox Sports Espanol (FSE) at 7pm ET.

(4) Finally, the match we’ll likely be watching at CultFootball HQ this afternoon: Barcelona vs. Panathinaikos at the Camp Nou, live on FSE. Barcelona was the favorite to win the Champions League last year, only to be foiled in the semifinals by Mourinho’s Milanese defense. They’re coming off a shocking home loss over the weekend, so it will be interesting to see how they fare today.

See below for the full list of today’s and tomorrow’s fixtures.

Commentary News

Hércules Hércules! Shocker at the Nou Camp

September 13, 2010 — by Suman — 1

Valdez 2nd Goal vs Barcelona — Valdez puts Hercules up 2-0 over Barcelona

The shocking result from this past weekend’s La Liga fixtures was Barcelona losing on the Camp Nou to newly promoted Hércules by a score of 2-0, with Paraguayan international Nelson Valdez scoring both goals. It was certainly an unexpected result, as Sid Lowe writes in the the Guardian:

Barcelona are the league champions; Herculés are making their first appearance in the first division since 1997 – in fact, they’ve spent just two of the last 26 years in the top flight. Hell, they’ve spent half of the last decade in the regionalised, four group, eighty-team Second Division B. And Barcelona had not been beaten by a newly promoted side for a decade.

Barcelona had won 17 out of 18 at home last season, drawing the other. They had not lost a league game at home for 16 months – and that didn’t really count, what with it being a who-cares-we’ve-already-won-the-title defeat against Osasuna. You have to go back to February 2009 for their last ‘real’ defeat at home – and that was a miracle. Since Pep Guardiola made his managerial debut in La Liga they have not once been beaten by two goals in the league. And Valdez, the goalscorer who doesn’t score, was making his La Liga debut. 2-0? To Herculés? With Valdez getting them both? On Catalonia’s official holiday, too? No chance.

Except that the ‘diada’ marks the bloodiest of Catalan defeats. Except that Herculés have a bit of a habit of this. The last time they were in the first division, back in 1996-97, they beat Barcelona twice. 3-2 at Camp Nou and 2-1 at the Rico Pérez – the game that effectively cost Bobby Robson’s side the title, handing it to Fabio Capello’s Madrid. Thirteen years later, history might just have repeated itself. Last night’s saw the two-point advantage over José Mourinho’s Madrid disappear; Barça now trail by a point.

Click thru to read Lowe’s whole essay–starting with an account of Valdez’s journey from Paraguay to Werder Bremen to Borussia Dortmund and now to Hércules.

Here is video of Valdez’s two goals–the first off a scrambling attack on Barca’s goal following a Herculés free kick in the 26th minute, and the 2nd a clinical finish off a rolling cross from the right side in the 59th minute (note how Valdez pulls up his run at the top of the box and hangs in that unmarked space):

Though this more complete highlights reel seems to show that it was Barcelona that dominated play and created many more chances–numerous near misses by the likes of Villa, Pedro, and Pique (coming up from defense for an aerial attack):

Things get even more interesting for Pep Guardiola’s side this coming week: they’ll get no rest, as they’ll be back on the Camp Nou tomorrow, hosting Panathinaikos in the first set of Champions League fixtures; and then they travel to Madrid next weekend, to play the top team in Spain.

No, not the overyhyped and overpaid collection of stars at the Bernabeu (who at least managed to finally score a goal this past weekend, at home against Osasuna), but rather the guys crosstown at Atletico Madrid. Led by Uruguayan star Diego Forlan, Atletico Madrid sits atop the table with two wins after two games (Valencia being the only other side with six points). Forlan has picked up where he left off in South Africa, scoring 3 goals in the first two matches. Atletico Madrid sits atop the table (Valencia being the only other side with six points).

Commentary Preview

Premiership Preview – As seen on TV

September 10, 2010 — by John Lally

A preview of this week’s Premiership fixtures coming up, just as soon as I add some shows to my Netflix queue…

Everton vs Man United (Saturday 7:45 ET)

The game: Rooney returns to the club where he started his career; I can’t wait to hear what the Everton fans sing at him…

If these teams were TV Shows:

Everton – Lost – a couple of their main characters are of interest (Arteta, Cahill, Jack, Locke) but you get the feeling they’re ultimately going nowhere.

Man United – The Sopranos – with Alex Ferguson as Tony: a ruthless leader, feared and respected by his men – both had unsuccesful stints as racehorse owners (though at least Rock of Gibraltar didn’t have the same fiery fate as Pie-O-My)

The Prediction: Everton just aren’t good enough this season – 2-0 United

Commentary

What’s That Stink on Rooney?

September 10, 2010 — by Sean — 1

Two parts of the Rooney Three-Way: Jennifer Thompson and Helen Wood

Wayne Rooney, this week’s scandal magnet, may not play against his old club Everton because Sir Alex feels the crowd treatment may unhinge the tiny bull. All this because he’s been caught in a threesome with professional sex-makers Helen Wood and Jennifer Thompson while his pregnant wife was at home, caring for the unborn Charlie Brown inside her womb. The Daily Mail has a sensitive and thoughtful piece on the matter:

For now, four days after the revelations that both women were paid £1,200 to have sex with Rooney, comes the reaction of their parents. Hamish and Danuta Thompson, who have heard their only daughter described as a prostitute and cocaine user, said they were shocked at her behaviour, spoke of their love and said they would face the crisis as a family. Despite being offered vast amounts to tell their own side of the story, Mr Thompson made it clear that while his daughter might have been prepared to flog her story to Sunday tabloids, the rest of the family were not – in any way – for sale.

Commentary

Remember Adebayor?

September 9, 2010 — by Sean — 1

It’s tough to care much about the beginning of the european footballing season. After the buzz of the world cup and the always fun transfer drama, club football’s jerky starts seem less urgent. Then comes this international break, and we’re only now really getting started. (By the way, Neymar and Ganso are both injured and not playing for Santos at the moment, and with Robinho gone too I have a hard time wanting to tune in.)

So I went strolling around for a bit of news about this weekend’s matches, and came across this little piece about Emmanuel Adebayor. The article is a couple of weeks old, and has ripened with age. Adebayor has to fight for his position at City, but he’s acting like the starter’s role is owed to him. He sits on the bench, not with a hunger in his eye, but with a pissy look on his face. And when he doesn’t get to play he starts talking about a transfer. Kudos to senior football administrator, Brian Marwood for laying down the law.

“These players need to realise that if you are paying them, they are salaried, contracted and have obligations to their football club. They are part of the squad. They have to work hard to prove they are worth a place in the team. We are trying to create a very competitive environment at Manchester City. “

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